MECDA PDC&R Monthly Progress Report
Well, the first day of the conference I had challenges even going…”Who was I to be going to this? Am I good enough? Do I deserve this? What am I thinking? Would someone find I out that I just an imposter?” “Will I be the fattest, oldest, (fill in the blankest) one there? Well the answers all showed up during that weekend.
I even injured myself at work that day as I was reading my office to leave. Geez, I’m good at manifesting roadblocks to my dreams. Had to go to urgent care on my way out of town and couldn’t move my left arm for the first day of the event. “Would I let this deter me?” Hell no!
When I arrived, I was given an amazing welcome gift basket that was fit for a queen. “Did they confuse me with someone else?...had to check the name badge, no it was me!!
Went to my room, lovely, spacious, no roommate…I fell onto the bed exhausted. It can be grueling fighting with your ego!!
Went to the mixer, it was fun meeting some of the other participants/instructors. I began to relax. Maybe I was one of them. Spent the night..till 2 am, hanging with Princess Farhana, Devilla, Zahra and Angelika in the bar. OMG, I had such a fun time just talking about dance, life, hopes, dreams, etc..
The next morning I got up for 7am yoga. It was the only day I made it to that class but I felt so accomplished by 8am! I loved Lori’s style and I was able to get some movement out of my left shoulder. So worth getting up for. I found that this set the tone for my experience for the rest of the conference. Pushing my self to get out of my ‘comfort zone’ and the rewards keep on coming.
The other classes were amazing. And the times outside of classes were truly life changing and inspirational!
Flash forward to ‘graduation’. The end of the conference was really emotional, saying goodbye was lovely and bittersweet. I experienced such a shift my consciousness. I really experienced the union of my authentic self and my dancer self…a true powerhouse team that just keeps on going even a month later.
So here’s what’s happened this past month…
First week back agreed to dance at Bedouin Bazaar then next week with my first instructor. 3 rehearsals=1 interesting performanceJ…but I did it…saying YES!! to opportunities!
Next week…Had an awesome rehearsal with my girls, got to hear about their first performance without me (they danced while I was at the conference!), I was in total gratitude! Told then they have to attend next year. Went to a conference for work but ‘changed my hat’ half way through and used my perspective as a dancer to make 3 contacts that would promote one of the purposes I discovered for myself at the retreat. That night I married my dancer self with my activist self and some of my troupe and I danced the revolution at Occupy Riverside as ‘corporate’ dancers who cast a spell over the 99%! Then we changed and went to our favorite coffee house and danced for Love your Body Day and ‘occupied our bodies’. What fun we had! That weekend, my partner and I went to an amazing Dia de los Muertos celebration in Hollywood and then went to catch Her Royal Highness’ show. We had a blast and talked for a really long time about a common goal that we have and decided to get together in November to start putting our ideas into action. We also discovered that we must be sisters separated at birth! The next day I danced with my troupe at a cultural festival doing a 30 minute spot with Khaleegi (with live drumming), cane, veil, etc. It was so much fun!!
The next week was prepping for a weekend with 2 Halloween inspired shows! My favorite time of the year!! They were both so much fun and my older daughter danced in one of them, it was a blast! We did two short sets in each show and got great feedback.
The forth week, I said yes to a talk/demo/mini-lesson for that Tuesday evening and delivered it! I spoke about the importance of self nurturing to caregivers at the Inland Regional Center for a moms supporting moms group. Those women came in so down and by the time we were up and moving, they were smiling, laughing, breathing…They even taped it and put it on Youtube. My marketing guru, Julie, told me to get testimonials and I’ve requested themJ! That week we also danced at Occupy Riverside again this time taking the ‘bankers’ into the fire-y depths of Hell!! We posted this on Youtube also. Then on Sunday we danced at another Haflaween show and had such fun, again.
So, to sum it up, more performances, more creative ways to use dancing in other areas of my life, more FUN!!
I also got on twitter, hoot suite, booked 3 other shows, sold a copy of my first poetry book, and planning a workshop and concert for January, set the date for my women’s conference (March 24, 2012), made some incredible friends, am a happier mommy and partner, have helped others increase their businesses with what I learned, started to work on my website, and many other things I cannot even put into words…and that’s just the first month!
”Who was I to be going to this?... I am an amazing dancer and woman with a unique voice and vision. I am a healer and activist, a woman of passion. Am I good enough?.. Of course I am! Do I deserve this?.. Yes, and so much more. What am I thinking..? I am thinking that everyone has a dream, the difference is that I am taking action. Would someone find I out that I just an imposter?..” They couldn’t because I am authentically me! “Will I be the fattest, oldest, (fill in the blankest) one there?... Does it even matter? I am releasing those excuses as I am discovering the fountain of youth and health thru dancing my dreams!
I am in such gratitude to everyone there, teacher, attendee, volunteer…b/c each person brought their own gifts and shared them generously with all who were there. Perfection!
BTW, I've never blogged before so be gentle with me!
Nancy aka Saahira Ruhi